Month of Vintage Underwear: Day 4

I used to think bullet bras were just silly, but I’ve kind of changed my tune. You know who hasn’t? My boyfriend.

“Lookit! Look how pointy my breasts are! Ahahahahaha! YES!” I squealed.

He did not reply.  He simply looked weary.

“Think how sad you’d be if you were with someone who didn’t get excited about dumb things,” I reminded him.

I exist to bring joy to the people.

So last year I fixed my awesome pink bullet bra, and then never wore it. And this is because it is a formidable contraption. Having reminded myself that you don’t put on a bullet bra like you do a regular bra, I tried it again this year. I seem to have solved my, “The cups keep riding up and my breasts sneak halfway out of them, from underneath” problem.

This year, I put it on as follows.

  1. Slip on shoulder straps, hook up many, but not all hooks.
  2. Bend forward, attempting to arrange myself in the cups.
  3. Stand up, hook remaining hooks.
  4. Hoist breasts into cups as they are supposed to be.
  5. Marvel at torpedo shape of bust line.
POINTY. SO POINTY
POINTY. SO POINTY

I added my Rago open bottom girdle, which does not mess around. It is constricting in all the right ways, and I’ve been kind of hard on it. It’s power net is strong, but one day I will break the hooks. Then I put on a slip, because I hate wearing cotton dresses without them. Speaking of cotton dresses, here’s mine:

I think the slight blur makes it look like an old picture.
Mrs. Cleaver.

It’s the Lindy Bop (honest, I’m obsessed with them) Charlotte dress in green. It’s lovely green, slightly darker than a granny smith apple, not too yellow, and I love it. I call it my Donna Reed dress.

Then, I decided to go all the way with the New Look look, and added a crinoline.

I think the blur makes it look like an old picture.
I think the blur makes it look like an old picture.

Ka-boom! Poofy skirt, little waist, pointy bust. I am an hourglass, through the wonders of science and power net.

What do you think of this mid-century silhouette? Too much? Too pointy? Awesome?

 

 

 

2 thoughts on “Month of Vintage Underwear: Day 4

  1. TOO AWESOME. There is no such thing as too mid-century. I’m suffering some pretty major vintage inadequacy watching these posts pop up every day. ^_^

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